Why You Can't Take the Easy Class

Cameron,
Last summer you did swim lessons one day per week for 1 hour, and your class lasted the entire summer.  You learned to be comfortable in the water, you played with a lot of toys and floated on stuff.  But you didn't really learn to swim.  Since you were only three, we didn't expect you to be swimming like a fish.... But this summer we knew that you needed something a bit more intensive so that you would make more progress.  Going to the pool with your brother too means that I have to hold him the entire time and cannot really hold onto you also.  So we need you to be a bit more independent so that I won't worry about you constantly.

This year we realized that the place where you have been taking gymnastics class also offers swim lessons, so we signed you up for a two week session where you go every day for 30 minutes.  You have a great coach who is gentle but pushes you to try more, and he is very patient when you get nervous or distracted.  But after you came home from your first class, you told me that all of the kids are bigger than you (which is true, some of them are almost 6 already) and that you were the littlest.  You said that it was much harder and you asked why you can't take the easy swim lessons again.

And here is the real reason why Mommy and Daddy told you no.  You are going to be just like us when you get older, and of course we like to only do the things that naturally come easy to us.  I don't want to run a half marathon because it will be hard and force me to stretch WAY out of my comfort zone.  Daddy loves being a natural athlete and gets very frustrated when he isn't automatically superior at something.  But when you are still young and we can make you, you are going to try new things that are hard.  We want you to confront your fear and punch it in the face.  (Thanks Jon Acuff, for your fabulous book subtitle!)

You are a brave girl, Cameron.  We are so proud of you for all the progress we have seen in not only your swimming, but in trying new things.  I know a lot of changes happened at once, with you moving to the Pre-K class at school and starting the next level of gymnastics too.  But we hope you see how much fun it is to conquer new challenges.  I hope to see you do it for all of your life.

Love,
Mama

Ten Months To Be Thankful For

Rhys My Love,
Here are my ten favorite things about you now that you are 10 months old!

1.  You are so busy!  You are standing and moving around all the time.  You have even tested out the waters with standing all by yourself even though I am not trying to hurry you into walking...

2.  Tickle fights.  You have the sweetest giggle.

3.  You love your big sister.  You laugh at all her silly noises and love to watch her play.  You are going to be chasing her soon.

4.  You are still a big thing in a little package.  You are now in the 3rd percentile for height and weight, but the doc says you are as smart as can be!

5.  Dada is your favorite, but I am working to get back on top.  Every time I say "Mama," you seem to answer with "Dada!"

6.  You are the un-pickiest eater and it makes me so happy.  You will try anything and pretty much finish whatever we give you.  You are a pro now at feeding yourself cheerios and holding your own bottles.

7.  No separation anxiety for you.  You seem to be fine with babysitters, going to daycare, and staying with family.  You smile at strangers and are a very friendly gentleman!

8.  Your hair is getting long enough to show off your curls.  I don't think I can bear to cut them even though they are a little crazy sometimes....

9.  Changing your diaper is like wrestling an alligator now.  But it makes me thankful that you are growing up to be feisty and strong!

10.  Did I mention that you are seriously handsome? (wink, wink)

Love,

Mama

Pictures of Days Gone By

Chomping on a toy before his two teeth arrived...

Mommy & Daddy on her 31st birthday!

Sweet Cameron in her soccer jersey

Cuddly bear Rhys Man

Easter Sunday with all the girls at Grammy's house

Happy to be out egg hunting in the warm weather!

My silly dinner date

Fun with Hattie & Ainslee

The greatest gift I can give

Cam and Rhys,
This may not be something you understand for a long time, but marriage is hard work.  Recently at the Academy Awards, an actor thanked his wife in his acceptance speech and said, "It is work, but it's the best kind of work, and there is no one I would rather work with."  People were shocked and started to question the state of their marriage, but I was honestly touched and amazed that he would acknowledge such a simple but powerful truth.

Lately your daddy and I have been talking alot about the work we are doing together.  It is easy enough with one child to focus your attentions on parenting, your jobs, your home, your hobbies... Anything but each other.  You can easily start to get into a pattern where you co-exist and share responsibilities, but you aren't sharing your life and love for one another.  A comedian I like jokingly said it this way... "You become partners in this horrible not-for-profit enterprise and then you create the worst roommates on the planet."

I wouldn't trade you for anything and would never want you to feel that I am complaining about you.  But please understand that kids change everything.  You wonder where half of your money goes every month.  You live in a never-ending cycle of laundry and dishes.  You are already exhausted by 8:30 when the kids go to bed, but that is the time when your chores START and your free time to do grown-up things is possible.  Just the thought of a full eight hours of sleep sounds like a magical fantasy.

So for me, the cycle goes like this: I get tired, I get cranky, I get ungrateful and I get mean.  Your daddy has had to patiently put up with me.  He works hard and puts in more hours than I might like, but he certainly doesn't want to come home and have to listen to my complaints about it.  I can't expect him to want to do romantic things for me when I can't even be appreciative when he takes out the trash!

About a month ago, we had a hard talk and acknowledged that we hadn't been working at it.  That we were both keeping tabs on the things that we were doing right and the other person was doing wrong.  That we were both so tired and frustrated that the best solution was just to throw it all aside and start over.  And even though we aren't perfect, we understand that it can be all too easy to NOT put in the work and let your marriage fall apart.

A friend confided in me that they are sleeping in another room and basically just keeping up appearances for their child.  Another friend went through a period of separation and then eventually filed for divorce.  They told me how they are managing splitting time between two homes now.  I cried when I heard about both of them.  And I said to myself, I don't want to end up there and I see how easily I could.

What I am trying to say is that the greatest gift I can give to you, my darlings, is for me to love your father well.  Not only to avoid doing bad things in front of you, but for you to see kindness and forgiveness in your own home. To have a sense of security and comfort in knowing that no matter what comes, we will always be a family.  You have an amazing Daddy, full of laughter and kindness and dependability.  And I want to show you how to love him every day, even if I feel like I don't LIKE him today.  I am lucky to be married to my best friend, and i want to live like it.

All my love,
Mama

You won't stay little for long.

Sweet Rhys,
What a lucky Mommy I am to have such a snuggle bug.  You are slowly growing into the next phase where you will be on the move and crawling soon, but for now you are still stuck in whatever spot we put you in.  This month you became a pro at sitting up and now have several favorite toys that you play with.  You really love one that has a steering wheel and makes lots of car noises and sings the alphabet!

This month you have been eating really well and continuing to grow.  You eat a jar of baby food, and you seem to like everything that we have tried, a still happily drink your bottle at every meal.  At your (somewhat late) 6 month checkup, you weighed 14 lbs 5 oz (6th %) and were 25.5 inches long (10 %).  You are perfect to me!  You finally grew out of the 3-6 months size of clothing and even needed an entire new batch of socks this month.  Apparently I turned around and your feet suddenly grew a ton because you are now wearing the 12-24 month size in socks!  The other size was mysteriously 3-12 months and wouldn't stay on your feet at all.  I think I bought you 20 pairs of socks in one day just so I wouldn't have to mess with them again.

The wonderful gift that God has given us in you is your mellow personality.  People comment that you are easy going and calm, not a fussy guy at all.  You like to people watch and you seem to go along with whatever schedule happens that day.  I think our routine for naps & feedings at home on the weekends is quite different from your norm at school, but you seem happy and content anyway.  You will soon require a bit more activity and planning, but for now you don't seem to mind just being home with me for an entire Saturday.

I have to say that this picture of the two of us made me so happy because I think you look like me.  I love when you wear a "fancy shirt" that looks like one of Daddy's.  Even just combing your hair after a bath makes me imagine what you will look like in just another year, since your sweet features seem to change so quickly now.  But you still have that sandy brown hair and those big brown eyes just like I did when I was little.  See?  This is me at 9 months!

Well, I am going to go give you your bedtime bottle and get in my snuggles right now.  I love you so much, Rhys Man.  You are more of a blessing than I could ever deserve.

All my heart,
Mama

If I don't say it enough....

My beautiful Cameron,

If I don't say it enough, you are growing into such a wonderful young lady.  You have started to see what it is like to have some independence and have challenges.  You have made new friends and shown yourself to have an open and giving heart.  You have started to see the consequences of the choices that you make, and you are quick to rebound and ask for forgiveness.  If I don't say it enough, we discipline you because we love you and want you to continue to become a girl that reflects God's love. 

 You are a generous big sister, quick to offer a distraction to your brother when Mommy is trying to finish a task around the house.  You love to see his big smile when you use your funny voice or dance around.  He gazes at you with wonder and love in his eyes.  My heart just melted when I snuck around the corner just the other day and  you were sitting in your brother's room showing him books and making him laugh.  I want to treasure these days before he is on the move and will inevitably be invading "your space" and taking off with your things.  If I don't say it enough, thank you for loving our family and being such a big helper.  You have a desire to please and honor us and I hope you know how grateful we are for you.

Your daddy has been so proud of you and your growing interest in sports.  After he went to a coaching conference in College Station, he brought you back your first cheerleader uniform.  You are still a bit of a fairweather fan for most things, just waiting to see who Daddy roots for and then joining in.  But he took you to a few basketball games this past month and said you were absolutely adorable with your passionate cheering.  At one point you yelled to the opposing team, "San Marcos, DON'T DO GOOD!"  He said he was happy to have a buddy to go with and that the real cheerleaders were quite taken with you.  So much for his efforts to show you the perks of actually playing sports... You were pretty excited about the possibility of just cheering!

But you are a strong athlete and quick learner!  You started gymnastics about a month ago and are doing great.  You are great at following instructions and you try not to take shortcuts.  Your teacher was impressed with your quick progression and said you will be fine to promote up to the next age group soon.  We just want you to have fun and be confident that you are capable doing things that may be different or even scary at first.  If I don't say it enough, you should keep your body healthy and be proud that God loves you just the way you are, a brilliant girl who can take on anything you want.

Not only that, but you are branching out into soccer too!  Our sweet friends the Davis family have organized a Wednesday group for a bunch of kids around your age that meets in their neighborhood park.  Most weeks you do fun practice drills and work on basic ball-handling skills, but you did have a few "scrimmages" where you were divided into teams and actually kept score.  It was a bit of a free-for-all, but you had a great time.  You actually scored 3 goals for your own team and 1 for the other team too!  My favorite part is when you had scored the first goal of the game and then another little boy from the other team scored.  You told him that he should be on your team, like you were forming a strategic alliance!  What a big thinker you are.  :)

 If I don't say it enough, I will try to do a better job.  We love, love, love you and are so lucky to be your family.  Thanks for being my best girl.

Hugs and Kisses,
Mama

Rockin' It at 5 Months

Little Man,

You are positively rockin it at 5 months!  I have a feeling that you are just going to keep getting more and more handsome and definitely more and more fun.  This is the month that we finally figured out how to eat rice cereal and now you are having it at lunch and at your last feeding before we go to bed.  It really does help you sleep from about 10:30 all the way until 4:00 usually, which is a wonderful break for us!  Thanks for giving us that little break.

 Here you are on the first night that I got you to eat a whole bowl of rice cereal.  I know it isn't the most exciting thing to eat, but you are finally getting the hang of the spoon and only manage to rub it all over your hands and most of your face.  You still look pretty small in the Bumbo seat, but I remember it didn't take your sister long to start growing and eventually her little legs were too chunky to fit!

And I am in love with this new robe you got for Christmas that makes you look like the world's cutest shark.  You have started to really enjoy baths since you discovered the sound of splashing water.  Now you like to kick your feet over and over and get Mommy or Daddy all wet!

We were a month behind in getting your most recent checkup, but since you had to get a bunch of shots I am sure you understand why we didn't rush it.  You were a perfectly happy boy since Mommy and Daddy were both off of work and took you to the pediatrician right before the end of the year.  You are small for your age, only the 9th percentile of height and weight, but we all know big things come in small packages sometimes!  I am guessing you will continue to grow and do things at your own pace, regardless of what we think is best!  Besides, it has been very convenient that you are have stayed in size 1 diapers for this long and we have made certain to use every last one before we moved you up to the size 2!  The doctor did say that you seemed very strong and are right on track developmentally for your age.  She said you were doing great!

Each passing month is going to bring so much change for you soon.  You still like to roll over onto your tummy while you sleep, so we try to put you on your back as much as possible and are leaving your arms untucked for safety.  You still have lots of ticklish spots and love to laugh and give Daddy big squeals when he makes silly noises.  You are completely mesmerized by the TV, especially when Daddy is watching sports.  He knows you will ask plenty of questions and understand all his favorite sports soon.

We love you very much and can't wait to watch you grow.  I have a feeling you will start crawling in just a few months time.  Thanks for all the funny stories and sweet pictures you have given us lately.

Hugs & Kisses,
Mama

Feliz Navidad

Sweetheart,

Your daddy and I were super proud of you when you performed in your school's Christmas program!   Your class sang two songs and you knew all the words and motions.  Mommy has a long video of you singing "Away in a Manger" and "Feliz Navidad" but it won't load for some reason.  So here are a few cute pictures of you singing with all your heart.

All the kids pointed out to the audience to say, "I wanna wish YOU a Merry Christmas!"

I guess it is fortunate that you are not shy at all and just sang your little heart out.  I think we might have to consider joining the kids choir at church sometime in the near future!

Kisses,

Mama

Let's Go Panthers!

Miss Cameron,
This year Daddy is very excited to be coaching the 7th grade A team at school and so far they have won all their games!  He is always thinking of ways to help them improve their skills and come up with new offenses.  His players are very respectful and he is having a great time coaching them.  We have been to a a few games to cheer them on, and this weekend Daddy thought that it would be really fun to let you ride with him when he picked up the school bus and drove his team to their tournament.  Mommy and Rhys came to pick you up later and we cheered them on to victory.  Later that afternoon, they even won the championship game of the entire tournament!

You must be their lucky charm...

Love,
Mama

Saying Goodbye to Jaxon

Cameron and Rhys,
I am somewhat thankful that you are still too little to really understand what has happened and I am not even going to try to explain it to you right now.  Our dear friend Jaxon Davis has gone to be an angel in heaven.  And we know for certain that he is worthy.  Jaxon had a brain tumor that made his short life very difficult, but Jaxon always was joyful and kind to others.  He spend all his time, whether he felt good or was sick, thinking of how to help other children who had to be in the hospital because they were sick too.  He was so good at giving toys and blankets to his friends that other people started giving Jaxon money and toys, knowing that he would be faithful to deliver them to all the kids that he could.  The Davis family spent a lot of time in Houston and many nurses and doctors knew them because they always wore the color yellow, which was Jaxon's favorite.  It is sunny and happy just like he was.

This week his memorial service was held at our church and hundreds of people came to tell Jaxon goodbye and show that they loved him.  It was the most joyful and yet the saddest service I have experienced because losing a child is every parent's worst fear.  Even though he was only five years old, thousands of people knew about his story and prayed for him.  Sometimes God has a bigger plan for your life than you can even imagine, and sometimes that plan will have things in it that you might not choose for yourself.  God does not promise that we will always be happy or healthy.  He does promise that he will never leave us, and that he loves us no matter what.

What I want you to remember about Jaxon is that he was always thankful and thoughtful.  He never complained about being sick and he never wondered why God would allow him to have to fight cancer.  He only thought of the people that were more in need than him and of all the ways that he could do something for them.  I pray that we will be the kind of godly examples that Jaxon's parents were to him.  I pray that you will be kind and giving, showing others that the love of Jesus in your heart can make a world of difference in a world that is not kind.  Jaxon was an angel to so many people during his five years here on earth and will inspire others to "Pay it Forward" just like he did.

In Loving Memory of Jaxon Davis
5/23/2007 - 11/25/2012