What Grandpas Are For

Cameron,
You won't know it for a while, but your Papa passed away two years ago today. It's like he was here one minute and gone the next. There are so many things you would have loved about him, and he would have loved every single molecule in your adorable body. Christmas really changed for me after that year, and now is a hard time for us. Okay, me. Last year I turned into a big old mess, and finding out two months later that I was pregnant with you totally turned me around. I think you saved me, Little Girl. Your mommy is a bit emotional, and sometimes I let myself get carried away with them. You were my anchor, my hope for tomorrow, my joy amidst the sorrows. I remember how it felt to be under that cloud and because of you, I haven't been there in a long long time.

Today I wish I could tell you every happy memory I have of your Papa. How kind he was to people when wanted to show his appreciation. How generous he was with his time and his talents. He could build the most beautiful things and fix just about anything. That big motorcycle of his, he would have loved for you to ride on the back with your little arms hugging him. He would have taken you on lots of trips and made you watch old western and science fiction movies. He would have shown you what Grandpas are for.

Tonight you went to see your Grandpa Billy and Gigi. You were so happy and smiled at them and cooed. Grandpa sat with you in his new recliner and helped you exercise just like your daddy does. Your head is getting stronger and you kick out those legs and try to stand. It is so cute! He was talking to you when I realized that his voice sounds so much like your daddy, and that's why you were so happy to hear it. Daddy has been at work today and won't be here until tomorrow, so I know you have missed him. He would have been just as happy as I was that you were such a good girl for your Grandpa and Gigi. They loved seeing you.

As wonderful as it was, seeing you with one Grandpa makes me sad to think about the one that you won't ever know. But especially at Christmas time, we focus on the hope that we have in God, the promise of heaven where we will see him again. I love you and am thankful for the blessing you are in my life. Merry Christmas, Cameron.